Body Language Tips: Using Your Hands to Build Rapport
“What should I do with my hands?” is the common question I get from people in my communications and body language programs.
Your gestures are important because they can be used to your advantage in conversations, meetings and interviews. The key is to be comfortable with your body movements so they seem natural and not awkward. A combination of strong verbal and nonverbal communication skills will help you to build rapport with clients, prospects and colleagues.
Here are 5 tips on gestures and how they affect your communication:
1- Fold your hands neatly in your lap when you are seated in a meeting. Avoid fidgeting or tapping your pen or fingers. This indicates you are anxious or nervous.
2- Open your palms and face them up to the ceiling when you are in a sales meeting with a prospect. This indicates you are open to his ideas and information. You are friendly and learning.
3- Place your palms down on the table when you ask for the sales or business. This indicates you are assertive and confident.
4- Avoid clenched fists. This gesture shows an emotional state of either anger or excitement. In a meeting, it can also indicate you are closed or tight.
5- Keep your hands to your sides when standing and speaking to someone. To gesture in a confident and casual manner, keep your elbows at your sides and extend your hands up out to the shoulder-chin range. Think of yourself inside of a 20-inch TV screen with a close-up shot that frames only your head and shoulders. As you speak, move your hands appropriately to match your words.
Some Fun Bonus Tips:
Hand or Finger on Nose= Deception-“Pinocchio”
Hand on Ear= Unwillingness to Listen Anymore
Hand Resting on Chin= Attentive
Scratch of Neck or Back= Disbelief
Some people are naturally more animated than others. Gesturing may not feel comfortable to you if you are more subdued or unaccustomed to using your hands and body to enhance conversations. My advice is to watch how others who are confident and successful move and tie-in gestures when they speak. After some observation and practice, you’ll be able to casually use your hand movements in a way that feels natural.
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