The New Trend in Communication: Silent Listening
By Susan Young, President, Get in Front Communications

Most business professionals are familiar with active listening skills, such as don't interrupt people, repeat key details, maintain eye contact and smile.

In this busy and competitive world, it's time to take our listening skills one step further. Enter the realm of Silent Listening.

Silent Listening requires us to slow down and virtually stop that noisy soundtrack that plays in our heads 24/7. Silent Listening calls for our absolute undivided attention, free of distractions, judgments, criticism, and planning our next response. It requires us to be present and in the moment.

Consider this: How many times have you asked someone a question that you were genuinely interested in and as soon as they began to respond, your mind was darting around aimlessly with random thoughts? These mental interruptions often happen in less than 2.4 seconds and can range from thinking about an e-mail, gas in the car, defrosting chicken for dinner or sending a proposal. These distractions pull you away from conversations that can result in missing important details. These arbitrary thoughts can negatively impact relationships. Many people can quickly sense when they are in a conversation alone.

Two years ago, I promised myself that I would work hard to be more focused and attentive. My goal was, and still is, to "be in the moment." That means that wherever my feet are, my head is. In other words, Silent Listening. This is not an easy task. Every day I have to literally pull myself back into the moment when those random thoughts starting bouncing around my brain. When I am in a conversation with someone, I have to be completely engaged and attentive to what they are saying and how they are behaving. There are no distractions, there is no pull. Where my feet are, my head is.

Here are three tips to using Silent Listening skills:

1- Resist the temptation to interject comments.Let the person who is speaking completely finish their thought. We're adults. There should only be one voice at a time.

2- Count to five slowly before you respond. People tend to be uncomfortable with silence but this practice will help to slow you down and will ensure that the speaker is finished.

3- Catch yourself if you begin to drift. When you become aware of your mind wandering or are planning your next response, pull yourself back mentally and reconnect with the conversation and the speaker.

Silent Listening is an essential business skill. It's especially important in sales. It shows people that you are fully engaged and care about what is being said and who is delivering the message. It helps us to remember people's names and intricate details. With Silent Listening, you are also showing compassion and congeniality (Emotional Intelligence). It helps to build strong relationships.

About the Author:

Susan Young is President of Get in Front Communications and Susan Young Media Relations. Their new "Recession-Proof PR" program and virtual coaching is for businesses and nonprofits who struggle to get publicity with small budgets and staff. Consulting, training and workshops on proactive public relations, media coaching and interpersonal communication are available. Young publishes a free e-zine Life's A Pitch and is the author of Communicating with Confidence: Tips & Techniques for Powerful Business Communication. Visit www.getinfrontcommunications.com and follow Susan's blog at http://www.getinfrontcommunications.com/motivational_speaker_blog/